Step Away From The Barbies

I'm exhausted.  I've had a headache for 4 days that won't seem to go away despite tons of Excedrin, Motrin and Aleve.  No, not truly tons, not all at the same time.  Thinking maybe I have been dehydrated, I've been drinking plenty of water.  Nothing.  This damn headache won't leave. The worst part being, my baby girl is now sick.  Going on day three.  Fever, cough, aches, etc.  A virus they say.  But you feel so helpless when you can't really do anything to make the misery go away.  Of course plenty of TLC helps, but that only goes so far. It's one of the few times I wish someone else were here with me.  As a mother, naturally I get worried when my child is sick.  It would be nice to have someone here who could hug me and tell me it will all be okay.  Someone who would hold me and let me cry out of sheer exhaustion and frustration.   Tonight is one of those nights I miss that part of a relationship.  It's...

I always get a little melancholy when school starts back up. I'm not one of those parents who looks forward to it. Fact is, even though I work during the day, I miss all the time I get to spend with Barbie, Jr. when she's not in school. A new school year is another year closer to my baby girl growing up. I had a discussion with her dad today about how much she's changed and how she's adapted to the changes in her life with such ease. And what a good kid she is and how proud we are of her. But the whole discussion, and the fact that we managed to have a discussion, made me think about all the changes that have happened over the past year. I knew this time last year that 35 was going to be a life changing year for me. I didn't know why, I just felt it in my gut. And shortly after turning 35, is when my world began to change. I am a completely different woman than I was. I'm still the goofy, not so shy anymore, loud, silly, not afraid to be me woman ...

I'm the same ol' Barbie Girl. I've got the same attitude, the same sense of humor, the same family, but my past is history. I'm starting new. Time to quit dwelling on what could have been, what wasn't, all that went wrong in my life and dwell on being fabulous. I would sit and read back through my old posts and while they make me who I am today, they also make me incredibly sad. Of course I saved a copy, but they can no longer be found on my blog. I want to focus on being a wonderful mom and a good person. I want Barbie, Jr. to see a mom that is happy, not sad and depressed. 2011 already has been a challenge. Barbie Jr, spent a week in the hospital, my dad spent almost 6 weeks in the hospital, and at times we weren't sure he'd make it out. I have a renewed thankfulness for many things, one being my family. Over the past few months, I've learned a lot about myself and a lot about people. I'm tired of settling. I want to be appreciated. And I...