Skip to main content

What is happy?

So I've survived several weeks of preteen angst.  After several discussions with other mothers of preteens I found I'm not alone.  And there's a strange comfort in that.  This week I had my sweet, loving baby girl back.  The week was not nearly long enough, of course it never is.  It seems that we bat an eye and our week together has come to an end.  It grows harder and harder to let her go but I maintain my composure, not daring to let her know how I struggle inside to say goodbye.

It's so lonely when she isn't here.  On my alone weeks I struggle to remember what happiness is.  I have too much time to think.  Sure, my zoo is here to comfort me, but they don't talk back, even if half the time she and I do have ridiculously goofy conversations.  I struggle to remember happy.  I struggle to remember love. I struggle to survive.  I'm surrounded by couples. I'm surrounded by happy.  And I force my smiles.  I don't feel like I have a purpose.  I don't feel passionate about anything.  I just feel like I am here, nothing more, nothing less.  I just exist.  I miss the friendship of my marriage. We did have good times.  I miss something stupid happening and one of us picking up the phone to call the other and say OMG let me tell you what happened.  These days when something happens, I have nobody to share it with. And it makes me sad.

I get tired of people thinking they "understand".  Some might but, most of those I guarantee have no clue what it is like to have literally no money to last them a week until they get paid.  I'm probably a paycheck away from losing everything.  I can't afford cable, I have a stove that doesn't work, and am surrounded by people who can spend money like it's nothing.  It was a huge deal for me to even be able to afford to pitch in a few bucks to help Barbie, Jr. buy a bicycle.  Meanwhile, most of my friends are going on and on and on about what they've bought, their next vacation or something that has to do with money.  While I sit quietly wondering if they realize how fortunate they are??

For the record this isn't a cry for help.  I have no desire to harm myself in any way.  It's just me pouring my heart out just for the sake of getting it off my chest in hopes that someday I will look back on this and be happy.  And not have to struggle any more to put food on my table or pay my bills.  Not have to cringe every time I get in my car while hoping it starts.  I hope someday I'll be happy.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Take Me As I Am

Ask my momma about the day I was born and you'll hear a story of my dad sleeping, my mom sneaking to scrub baseboards, her hemorrhaging and both of us nearly dying.  Moral of the story, I came into this world to the beat of my own drum.  No, no birth is "typical" but this event set the stage for my life. I was never the kid who wanted to be like all the other kids.  I was always unique.  I was never afraid of what people might think.  I did my own thing.  I still liked New Kids on the Block when I was 18, did I care?  No.  Did I care that I maybe didn't dress like everyone else?  No.  Did I care that my hair wasn't perfect?  No.  Little things that added up to make me who I was. While I've changed a lot over 37 years, one aspect that has changed very little is the fact that I still, march to the beat of my own drum.  And it's often said, that is one thing people admire about me.  That I've never been afraid to ...

100 random things

Apparently, this is my 100th blog entry post-divorce.  I wonder what I'd be up to if I still had up my archives???  Anyway, I will attempt to tell you 100 random things.  Some you might already know, some you may not.  Let's see how I do: I have a Barbie poster hanging in my current bedroom. I currently have 3 cats, a dog of my own and a foster dog My toenails are painted purple My fingernails are painted black My hair is the longest it has been in 20 plus years I'm happier overweight than I was when I was thin I spent half my life in a relationship with my ex-husband I have several nicknames including: Fred, Freddie, Froffie and the newest Froffles I have 5 tattoos Most of the shirts in my wardrobe are black or gray I stocked up on Puffs tissues with Vicks because you can only find them in the winter I have an older sister My parents are both retired I was a majorette in high school I also played clarinet I can no longer read music I wish I could...

Kicking and screaming

I've been a real pain in the ass lately.  Mean, horrible and bitchy.  Tonight I have been tearful.  That's just not me anymore. And I've thought.  A lot.  I'm not sure why I'm like this.  The only solution I can come up with is the fact that I will be 38 in 2 days. 3 years ago when I turned 35, I knew in my gut it would be a life changing year. I didn't know how, I just knew something big was going to happen.  A few weeks after my birthday, I found out about the affair.  It was a needed change, but during that year all I felt was numbness.  And I was overwhelmed. 36 I had hoped would be better.  It wasn't.  That was the start of Barbie, Jr's separation anxiety.  Therapy. The start of the custody case. 37 I just knew things would be great.  It was also the start of alternating weeks with Barbie Jr.  My having to move (which was a positive thing in the end). And battling it out with my ex-landlord.  Could hav...