Skip to main content

Sexy and I know it?

The fact that my life is a constant drama has become the topic of amusement in my family and rightfully so. But if I have learned anything over the past 2 years, it's been to roll with the punches, dust myself off and move forward stronger and learning from whatever lesson life might hold at the moment. The latest is the saga of Barbie's Not So Dreamy House. Barbie will be relocating her dream house over the next couple of weeks to a new location. It's a good thing although the circumstances leading up to the relocation not amusing. It will all around work out for the best. I'm back in the dreaded dating field yet again. I still have that insecure voice inside of me who is convinced that my date will take one look at me and run the other way. Although the logical side of me says if he did, that would be his loss. But the insecure side of me would crumble and die if that ever happened. But I've developed the ability to mask my insecurity well. I was referred to as sexy the other day and I wanted to scream, are you freaking kidding me? Have you really LOOKED at me? I mean c'mon! But I didn't. I did what any good actress would do and said, Well, thank you.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Look What the Cat Dragged In

 It's been a hot minute huh?  1,312 days to be exact.  Yes, I gave it a goog. I've been back several times but words escaped me.  Nothing would come out.  I was in a bad place for a long time.  But after a whole lot of patience, many prayers, and the support of my family and friends, I made it.  And it's worked out well for all of us.  We moved early this year into a cute little house.  Just me and my kids. My little guy, we will call him Felix, he's happier and has been a champ with the change.  He gets the best of both worlds.  Barbie Jr, she's been a Godsend.  I don't know what I would have done without her. There have been differences in ending a relationship vs. divorce (obviously).  Ins and outs.  But this time around, I can actually say Felix's father and I are doing pretty well at this co-parenting thing.  Which is an odd situation for me given what I went through with Ken.  But even that part is going well. Barbie Jr. graduated from high school in M

Kindness goes a long way

My last post was about how I refused to be irrelevant. I posted it the day before my 42nd birthday.  It was and is a phrase that has stuck with me.  I haven't blogged since, although I have been planning to. So months later, here On my birthday I received an anonymous gift of a beautiful Edible Arrangement with the attached card: I want whoever you are to know, I carry this with me in my wallet every single day.  I have a few special things that I keep with me always, a drawing Savannah did, a poem she wrote me to tell me everything would be fine when her dad and I were in an ugly custody battle, and now this.  Whoever you are, your kind gesture holds a spot among the most treasured things I carry with me day in and day out.  I take it out when I am having an especially down day to remind myself that I do matter.  That I am relevant. Yesterday was one of those days.  I was feeling down, unloved, unappreciated, so I took the note out and read it. And through my tears of frustr

I refuse to be irrelevant.

After insisting to my friends at work that I had *tried* to watch "Grace and Frankie" I discovered that I lied.  I had watched maybe 15 minutes of the show.  So I gave it a second chance.  I'm about halfway through the first season and something the character Grace said hit me like a ton of bricks.  "I refuse to be irrelevant." I. Refuse. To. Be. Irrelevant. To me it is a powerful statement.  And one I need to relate to more.  Because I can so related to feeling irrelevant these days.  I feel like I don't matter.  I mean of course, there are people I matter to, and others who make me feel irrelevant.  Who make me feel like my presence doesn't matter.  And I blame myself. Tomorrow is my birthday and I don't even care.  I've always been all woohoo, my birthday is coming up.  This year? I could care less.  It's a Tuesday.  I have zero expectations.  I'm sure people on Facebook will wish me happy birthday, but otherwise, it just feels l